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The biryani I ate with my parents doesn’t taste the same when served on cold metal mess plates. The rice sticking to the sides and the eggs never quite fried right and the meat always conspicuously absent. The sweet rice and milk dessert doesn’t taste as sweet when there is no one to clink spoons with and no one to finish the last few morsels when you’re full so nothing wastes. The milk always tastes like it has curdled when you have no one to mock the way you prefer to eat it, whether you like it with masala or are more of a sweet bent. The chutneys and the achaars feel bland without a healthy accompaniment of news channel vichaars blaring in the background. The roughness of the carrots mimicking the harshness of my surroundings, the fish is stale and dry when it isn’t my grandfather who goes to the fish market at 5am to pick only the freshest fish for me amongst the grating market sound. Apple tarts and apple pies you can buy wherever you go and they may taste like heaven, sugar, and sweetness but not like love anymore because love was contained in the cupcake liners amongst the other tins that are raided by us when they come out of the oven. Love is contained in the streetside momos picked by the parents for their hungry, fussy child. Love is found in remembering our daily conversations and small little wins. The mess plates have five compartments, And here I, far away from home, am absentmindedly hitting my spoon against all five. Maybe the food I have here is good and I just don’t know it because my love is contained in the food that I left at home.
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